"You're not going to believe what I found in his bathroom" 9.18.07

OK, I know it's not polite to go snooping through people's medicine cabinets, but you're not going to believe what I found in his bathroom.

I found soap.

I know, I know, of course I would find soap in a bathroom, but you don't understand. This soap was in the medicine cabinet, obviously hidden, but still accessible enough for him to grab it and take a whiff whenever he felt the need.

Did I tell you what it smelled like? Roses. It smelled like roses.

I know him and I can tell you for sure that he's a Dial man through and through. And not that mountain-spring fresh blue Dial, either. He uses the standard yellow bar. He is a Dial man.

And yet there's that rose-smelling soap. I imagine it's pink, although I can't tell because of the dainty, yellowing wrapper around it. But I'm sure it's pink. I know it.

Why is it there?

What? You say it doesn't matter? Of course it matters! What would he have to hide? Does it belong to someone else? Did some chick leave it at his house? Or maybe it's his grandmothers? Ew. Either way, it's unhealthy, him having that rose soap hidden away like a treasure. And why would he make it so easy for me to find? What is he not telling me that he wants me to know?

Well I'm sorry you seem to find this discovery so uninteresting. I mean, what did you expect I'd find in there? He's like an open book, he never hides anything. Why, I know everything about him. Everything. You just ask him and he'll tell you the same thing.

But I didn't know about that soap.

Maybe I should ask him. Yes, that's it, I'll admit that I was trying to find an aspirin or something. I don't want him to think I'm nosy or anything. I'll mention the soap. I'll let him know that I happened to notice it had the faintest scent of roses. I'll casually inquire where it came from. Not for my own use, of course, but just out of innocent curiosity. We'll see what he says. I'm afraid of what he'll say. Because why is it there? Why hasn't he told me already?

Oh, you have to go? All right, well thanks for stopping by. I'll be sure to let you know what happens.

* * *

You're not going to believe what I found in his bathroom. A dead body. Nah, just kidding, it was that darn rose soap again. No, no, I haven't asked him about it yet. You know, it doesn't really matter anyway. I mean, it's just a bar of soap. I wonder what that one tastes like. Do you think he'd notice if I took a bite?